Monday, April 13, 2015

Angry at the Parents

I'm feeling very disappointed and just hopeless that I'll have a good relationship with my parents. I found out this weekend that, although my dad had found out through the insurance company that I was diagnosed with depression when in college, he never told my mom. And then I told her, and her response was pretty underwhelming. I expected she might be angry at my dad, I thought she might want to talk to me about it maybe even apologize for not being there for me.

But there was none of that. She just carried on like I had said nothing. She even had a great opportunity to talk to me alone about it, and she didn't say a word. 

Then I had an argument with my dad. We are switching cars and I signed over my title to him and now he's saying we need to switch license plates. He's a terrible communicator and I just can't believe he really understood the person at the BMV because how can you take a plate off of one car and put it on another? So I said that I don't think that's what the woman meant and he started to get angry and said, 'well, i don't want to buy new plates!'  

And it went downhill from there. First I've heard that we'd have to get new plates, and if he was so against it, why did he insist we sign the titles now in the first place? This was just something i'd been doing to humor him, because he wouldn't leave me alone about it, I don't have any idea why he wants me to have the title to this car, they're both his cars and even when I've had the title to one of his cars, he treats me like he still owns the thing so I really don't give a shit. I'm saving up to buy my own so I can be free of his insanity.

So I left pretty angry and my mom was like, 'let's make a plan to go walking next week,' and I didn't make any commitments because spending time with them any time soon is the LAST thing I want. I am at the point where even thinking about them stresses me out enough that I'll want to abandon all healthy plans and go home, curl up in bed with some chocolate. If they call or text me, I'm mad for days. Who knows how long it's going to take to recover after these interactions.

I just want to forget these people exist for a while.

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